If you don’t care to read my rant about some colossally self-absorbed jack-assedness, then just look at the pretty picture of this morning’s sky and then move along.

Years ago I did some design work for a charity event and wound up in the email address book of one of the committee members. After the event was over I remained on her contact list, even though we had never actually met, because when she went to work as a sales rep I got an email announcing how excited she was to be joining ABC Enterprises, she was so thrilled with this new company, and would be calling on me personally very soon to discuss all the ways they could benefit my business.

About six months later I got an email announcing her departure from ABC to embark on an exciting new opportunity with DEF Incorporated, while ABC was a wonderful company, and she had made many dear friends there, she was anxious to set off in a new direction, and would soon be calling on me personally to discuss all the ways DEF could benefit my business.

After a few more of these emails at regular six-month intervals, she sent one announcing that she was going into business with a dear friend as a free-lance event planner. Naturally, she would soon be in touch to discuss working with me. So helpful, with all zero corporate events I needed to plan. A few months into her event planning career, she emailed again announcing that event planning had led her to discover her true calling…Life Coaching.  She would be in touch soon to discuss how her new-found life coaching skills could help me optimize a job search, organize a move, find a mate, or discover my true calling in life. Apparently there are a whole lot of people out there who have no idea whether to shit or wind their watch, because I started getting invitations all the seminars and retreat weekends she was doing around the country with price tags of five to fifteen hundred dollars. By God, it looked like she really had found her true calling.

On Friday I received her latest email/newsletter update.The headline “IT’S REAL!” was followed by several paragraphs describing her diligent search for a doctor who could diagnose her persistent pain and chronic exhaustion. The upshot was that she had finally been diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Fibromyalgia, and there was a link to an online diagnostic questionnaire (sponsored by a drug company) to help you diagnose your own CFS and Fibromyalgia. (!?!)

Now I am not here to pass judgement on either of those as valid medical conditions, but the checklist of symptoms could have described anything from a slight hangover to uranium poisoning. At the end of the list you were congratulated on finding a diagnosis, and encouraged to rush to your doctor and demand their treatment, which offered hope and just maybe the slightest possibility of a potentially fatal side effect.

She hoped that her friends and clients would understand that she would be curtailing her travel and speaking engagements to deal with her illness. Apologies to those of you in Cleveland, Little Rock, and Pittsburgh. She would however be honoring her commitments for a seminar held on a cruise ship, one in Oahu, and one in Miami, where there were still a few slots available, if you are interested in turning 2010 into a year of personal growth with an inspiring and award-winning life coach.

The fact that she had to have sent this email while being bombarded with images of people being dragged from the rubble of Port Au Prince made me livid in the face.

Or maybe it was my undiagnosed auto-immune disorder flaring up.

Trackback URI | Comments RSS